Come and hear, all you who fear God;
let me tell you what he has done for me.
Psalm 66:16 NIV
Hello, sister in Christ 🌸 Today, I wanted to share with you something a bit personal.
I was going through my old journals, trying to find the password of an email I had locked myself out of, when I began to take a closer look at the journal. It was from 2003. I was fresh out of high school at the time, disconnected from family, and struggling with money.
I had no religion at the time. I enjoyed reading philosophy, but that’s about as far as that went. And as I read the pages of this old journal, I felt so sad! Back then, I was broken-hearted, I was broke, I was completely confused about my future and (in retrospect) depressed.
This is the type of thing I drew in this journal:
I had no hope. I was empty. I felt abandoned by everyone and the world just simply wasn’t working for me. I wrote about death as if it were one long merciful sleep. Three years after this journal was written, I would begin drinking heavily. Everything got much, much worse…
Then God Came Along…
I struggled for a long time to get a good life on my own, and I did okay. Eventually, I was sober. I had a job. I even tried to mend fences with my family, but that did not go well. However, I was getting up on my feet, slowly but surely.
Yet I still felt sort of… empty.
So, about a year and a half ago, I prayed for “whatever was out there” to help me out. To point me in the right direction. I admitted to myself that I had no idea what I was really doing, and I needed help. Without much flair or magic, I got the urge to read the Bible– for the first time in my life.
So I did. I read the entire Bible, from Genesis to Revelation, in six months. And I surrendered my life to Christ.
What Has Changed…
Everything. Everything has changed. I went as far as I could go in life, and when I could go no further, Jesus came and got me. He took my hand and saved me 🙂
And I recently noticed something curious– I enjoy music again. I was really into music in my mid-teens, but as life got tougher, I stopped enjoying music. It was just there, some cathartic thing to sing. But ever since I gave my life to God, I feel music once again. I enjoy it! I love it!
I no longer feel that emptiness that was with me for so many years. Instead, I feel loved. I feel secure. I feel that, no matter what happens in life, everything will be okay. More than okay, because God is now with me.
As Jesus was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed begged to go with him. Jesus did not let him, but said, “Go home to your own people and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.”
Mark 5:18-19 NIV
You know, I used to hear the term “born-again” a lot, but it never really clicked. It never really made sense. But now, feeling like a brand-new person in Christ, I get it. I understand what it means to have a new life.
It feels like waking up from a nightmare. It feels like getting a blank slate, a second chance. It feels like being born anew. Being born again! ❤️
Praise the LORD!
I will thank the LORD
with all my heart
as I meet with his godly people.
Psalm 111:1 NLT
Thanks so much for reading this bit of my personal life. Although I tried my best to articulate it, there really are no words to explain just how much Jesus Christ has changed me. There are no words to express just how much good He has done in my life. I really didn’t know the meaning of the word gratitude until now.
Take care and God bless,